Even as I seek to use the silence for reflection and prayer (I don't close my eyes while praying), I find myself instinctively reaching for the radio switch periodically.  It makes me wonder what else in me has become so automatic that I am not even conscious of my 'programmed response'.  Other than wanting to hear some blues music or Car Talk (I have asked Jesus for a dispensation on Car Talk- no dice) in some Pavlovian response, I wonder what thoughts and attitudes I have programmed in my head/heart/soul.

    Apparently we are very effective in 'wiring' our own brains.  If we tell them something enough, demand responses from them enough, they will cooperate and be trained to accept these as cognitive norms.  Eventually they will go to these places without being prompted consciously by us.

    So what else have I wired my mind to do/think/react?  What about trust?  What about generosity?  What about suspicion?  What about hoarding?  What kind of attitudes to certain faces, body types, personalities have I taught myself over the years?  Which are life giving 'programs' and which are not?  And what would it take to see what I have programmed myself to do autopilot- like?

    As well, what can I do to consciously rewire myself toward the fruits of the Spirit, toward the heart/soul/mind of Christ?  One thing I am doing in the car is praying for folks who are, shall we say, less than courteous to me or others on the road.  Instead of my usual, 'and also with you' response, I offer them to Jesus- not that he would wreck their car!, but simply holding them up to God, allowing God to determine if and what they need.  In addition, hopefully, to wiring generosity in my brain, I find it helps my blood pressure- not a bad fruit.  It has caused a bit less judgment and created a bit more space in my heart for others.

    Not sure what will happen in Easter.  I confess I long for the sounds of Buddy Guy and John Lee Hooker, let alone Ray and Tom, to return to my speakers.  Perhaps there will be a compromise.  I hope not to undo any healthy rewiring that may be happening in these 40 days.

Todd Donatelli